30 & 3

This thing on? Sorry to the two of you who read this blog ... this week has been l-o-n-g and I haven't felt as if I had anything to say. So no updates :(

It's been a good week baby wise, but emotionally it's been pretty taxing. Not sure why, other than the fact that I've now been in the hospital for 39 days and I've been on bed rest for 53 days total. Yes, you read that right. March came and went, sometimes quickly and sometimes slowly. Generally, March is one of my favorite months of the year since it starts (ever so slowly) to get a little warmer, you can tell spring is on its way, I celebrate my birthday, etc. This year, not so much. Don't get me wrong - I'm am thankful. Very thankful. Today I am 30 weeks and 3 days pregnant. And that's just awesome. Considering the fact that I will deliver no later than April 28, we are definitely on the down slope in terms of time here.

Babies looked good on the ultrasound yesterday. Both heartbeats good, dopplers good, movements good, breathing good. The doctor said that the babies are happier than their mom. He changed his tune when I gave him a "what in the world are you talking about" look. He then quickly said that I was surprisingly pleasant for someone who has been here so long. I may be going crazy, but I have prayed that I would at least be pleasant throughout this stay so that it would be better for everyone involved. And I'm not trying to brag, but the one thing I have been (by God's grace alone) is pleasant!

I was reading on Wednesday night and came across these two verses which I've been trying to pray and believe fully. Psalm 4:8 says, "I will lie down and sleep in peace, for you alone, O Lord, make me dwell in safety." Psalm 5:3 says, "In the morning, O Lord, you hear my voice; in the morning I lay my requests before you and wait in expectation." After what happened late last week, I had been a nervous wreck all weekend and into the beginning of this week. Just paranoid about what might happen and when and worrying about the babies and myself. I spent three days being scared of what it is come and I finally told Justin on Sunday night that I had to relax a little before I caused something to happen because I was SO worked up! And then I read these verses this week and was reminded that God knows when I sit and when I rise (and when the babies move) and that he is so aware of our situation. So I've been trying to sleep in peace and lay my requests before God in the morning, waiting in expectation for what he is going to do. I've still had many moments of anxiousness, but I'm trying to rest in the truth of what God tells us through his word.

And then I came across this message earlier today and I was beside myself as I realized once again that we are created by God and for God. Fearfully and wonderfully made. Each and every one. And that his strength is what will get us through everything that we encounter in this life. He promises us that.

And what we do with our little dash of a life can have a big impact on those around us. Or maybe not. Depends on how we live. I'm not talking about perfect living .. I'm simply talking about loving God and loving others to the absolute best of our ability. That's what I'm praying for our family - that Justin, myself and our son and daughter will love God and love others as best we can. And that we'll never say years from now that we were so busy with life that we missed loving in the midst of it.

Okay, no clue how to imbed the thing just yet - here's the link -http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_e4zgJXPpI4

Thanks for praying for us continually. God has to be doing something in us that we cannot see yet and we're looking forward to see what it is as we move forward in this journey.

And by the way, if you want to pray for this family as well, that would be great. I have no idea who they are, but their story is so similar to ours and I came across their blog today - http://beauandbrittanydaniel.blogspot.com/ - I can totally relate.